The Last Three Stooges Volume

I think it's the last Three Stooges shorts volume, coming out, to be available tomorrow, June 1, 2010.

I have all the others, so naturally I want the last one. I like watching them.

Memorial Day Humor

I went shopping for Memorial Day flowers, so I could decorate the graves of loved ones.

Most of them were easy to shop for, a pink wreath for Grandma, a blue wreath for my baby brother. But then there was Uncle Hank, who needed something special.

For him I wanted to take part of this wreath, part of that wreath, in fact a little part out of many different wreathes.

He always had a sweet tooth, so I wanted to give him a serving of "Wreathes' Pieces."

Jello

The new Jello commercials are so cheerful. I really like them. They have a cute song and cute graphics.

Coincidentally, we had Jello with dinner tonight!

A Free Straw!

I went by a restaurant today, a fast food place, that had on their sign outside the fact that if you buy a large drink you get a free straw with it!

Wow, a free straw!

The imagination runs wild about how great their straws must be.

Sacred Journey, My Ass

I went into a sacred journey store yesterday. I was kind of enthusiastic about it. But then just looking at the stuff, I got a fairly empty feeling, not quite queasy but just empty.

One, no one there really seemed like they were on any kind of sacred journey, but maybe they were... who knows?

Two, even if they were they were just there to sell trinkets, rain sticks, and other garbage. Although I must say, I do like the sounds that rain sticks make. But in all the times I've been looking at them I still haven't bought one yet. I am tempted.

You see tie-dyed wall hangings and stuff, and I'm kind of in the mood for that, but none of it grabbed me. I was waiting around for the inner light and my mind to say "this is it," but it didn't happen.

I shouldn't judge, but I do. As far as I'm concerned, there wasn't anything sacred about it.

Dragon 10 Speech Recognition Software

I've been doing my blogs with this speech recognition software, with very mixed results.

There's something on virtually every line that is wrong and that I have to correct. It's frankly amazing how often it screws up. It's not really saving me much time, that's for sure. But I'm a very fast typist and also very accurate, so I probably need this less than the average person.

Having said that, it did the previous paragraph perfectly, without a mistake. So that ought to mean something. On the other hand, since I'm kind of pissed off at it I am pronouncing my words very carefully. (I actually said, "I'm" there... but they changed it for me, and the second time it used the word "aim.") On this paragraph, I had to correct or five things. That's very bad. I could've typed the paragraph three times in the amount of time it took me to say it once.

I'm really not in breast.

Err, what I actually said was, "I am really not in progress to." No! I said, "I'm really not impressed." Finally, the stupid thing got it right. Does that look like something that would save time to you?

That's an interesting statement... I'm really not in breast...Ha ha...

There Is Only One Big Mac

There is only one Big Mac.

This news is brought to you from a Big Mac box that originally held the Big Mac hamburger that I had today.

I don't ordinarily go to McDonald's, but certain things about my life have changed. So there I was, confronted with a choice, and this was my choice.

I used to eat Big Macs a lot. I remember eating them back in the 70s and even consciously thinking, "I wonder how many more Big Macs I'll eat in my life." Because back then I was eating a lot of them. But in recent years, like I said, not so many.

I like the box and the very direct slogan, "There is only one Big Mac."

Hall & Oates Remakes

The other day I was at a store, and of course a lot of them are playing music over the speakers. I was interested to hear a new version -- new to me -- of Hall & Oates' "Private Eyes," by some sweet woman singer. It was very lovely.

Then, amazingly, the next day I was in another store and heard another remake of a Hall & Oates song, also by some sweet woman singer, in this case, "I Can't Go For That." I always liked that song! This version was very sweet.

The big difference, other than being by a woman singer and being a little jazzier, was that they left out the "no can do" piece in the refrain. But that was okay, and they probably figured that anyone who knew the song, like me, would be mentally filling it in or even singing it anyway.

Now I am wondering if the two songs might have been recorded by the same woman and would be from the same CD, and if so... who she might be. What other great Hall & Oates remakes might she be responsible for?

this is written with Dragon 10

I feel very self-conscious right now because I'm dictating this blog post with a new program that I got that turns talking to text it's called Dragon 10. Since I'm not used to talking when I write something cursing is coming out a little more stilted.

Then add to that of the probable 80 very predictable situation where the program is not 100% accurate, probably mostly my fault, and I'm not always optimistic about the results.

Sally Sally perp burp him and Sally Perper per burp and hand me Sally Perper burp Perper burp Sally Prober were Sally Perper burp him and me went downtown to their rec center and that got into a big fisticuffs and started to R.@half until we all got downright drunk then the UH UH UH went to the library and feed on the post feed on the post repeat on the post I can't say I paid him the post a year and they did on the post they urinated on the post finally.

A couple of people saw us sitting there and were amazed at our addiction our addiction power in our diction.

They were amazed at our diction, our ability to speak in such a way that Dragon 10 recognized it.

Notice I am trying to say Decca should diction not addiction or anything about Decca.

I don't think that this will replace typing. LOL point! Point well taken he said point well taken, he said.

At this point in my life I'm looking out a window and I see a brick chimney standing tall except against the house of courses built right into the house because probably on the other side of it the people have a fireplace.

Him but this word go forth from henceforth even now and for ever -- world without end -- that we will bear any burden, specially those easy to bear, and so forth. I'm wind when the team got a big win will be lucky what they look well well I can't say what they would be Goldbergheaventhere is a Place on Earth called heaven and it's there that say it's true and if you don't believe it I'll tell you what to do is take a stand my friend and stand the pond lower rock and if you will not do it your pond scum you are pond scum.

There is no chalice like an old chalice, like a cold chalice to drink from.

The speaker gave a mighty peroration, with his oratory take lying the stars take lying the stars tickle Lane tickling the stars. What's a matter, don't you know the phrase to claim the stars, tickling the stars?

Funkified

I need a placeholder for today, some post to post so that I won't have an endless streak of no posting.

If I'm funkified, it's just a temporary situation, as I get used to my brand new life. My whole life switched around unexpectedly and miraculously in the last few months. I'm in a different place. I'm doing something entirely different. It's wild ... as wild can be.

No one saw it coming. I didn't see it coming. So like is ... funky.

I need to transition this into total and constant happiness. Why the heck not?

Questions Aquarium Newbies Ask

It's a sad scene, to see an aquarium newbie in a pet store. Of course we all started out somewhere, so we don't want to rub it in too much for these poor, unknowing souls.

Still, it's kind of funny (not laughing to their face), some of the things they ask:

Does the pet store sell water?
Is water part of the kit?
Do the fish need little air tanks?
What keeps them from drowning?
Can I add a room if they get too big?
Am I supposed to put their food on a plate?
Do fish use napkins?


We want to roll our eyes and say "O Brother!" But that wouldn't be nice. So we just answer their questions with a straight face, and they go home none the wiser that they've made several newbie boo boos.

So Tired I'm About To Fall

I've had a few days where I was so tired I was about to fall.

I'm starting to feel like that now, as the day wears on. But for the most part this was a good day, like the last couple.

But a few before that, wow, I was so tired I could've fallen over.

When I get tired like that, I feel that confusion that you feel before you fall asleep, and it makes me start wondering about consciousness and how you know that you're in waking consciousness. Because there's some very nasty counterfeit consciousness right at the seam between wakefulness and sleep. You could run over someone.

One day I drank a Coke to wake myself up. This is noteworthy because I quit drinking soda pop three years ago coming up in June. So that's how desperate I was, that I would drink a Coke when I had that huge streak.*

*As disclosed elsewhere on one of my blogs, I do have a little bit of red pop at Christmas, as part of a family tradition that itself has a very long streak, going back to the legendary time when Grandpa first started the family off with red pop at Christmas.

The Mighty dbkundalini Strikes Again!

Where will this unknown creature appear next? I've been out on the street, walking amongst you, all but unknown, except in my own mind.

I saw my wild tangle of hair in the street windows and thought about tamping it down. Then I thought again.

No one knows. They just see an anonymous guy with a wild tangle of hair.

May 1

May 1 looks like May I.

"Mother, may I?" was a game of some sort. I can't remember how it went.