Ephemera

In my quest to digitize my life, to photo or scan the various personal documents I have around the house -- including old class notes and all kinds of stuff -- I went through several boxes in the basement this evening.

There's some real ephemeral stuff in there, including Post-It notes with phone numbers of people we don't even see anymore, from other towns we've lived, cassette tapes of stuff, a few video tapes, and a lot of old bills. We of course keep our bills around in case we're going to need them. But not as long these days as we used to, since we pay everything online.

Some of the old bills, bank statements, etc., were from 1992-1993, in there. They're down by a place where the pipe had leaked one time, till the plumbers fixed it, so they're a little musty and a few things were stuck together. Those I'm not digitizing! Those are being shredded.

It's a blast from the past to see some of this old stuff. But not such a blast that I'd wish it were endless.

Mean Mr. Mustard

This person I'm with really uses the condiments.

She wastes mustard, as far as I'm concerned, with big blobs going on the bun.

Now I know why our mustard bill is so high.

Michelle Bachmann: Total Moron

Really, how do you get this stupid? Is there no way for voters to judge these people before they're inflicted on the country? Good grief.

Michelle Bachmann, that ridiculous twerp from Minnesota in Congress, suggested that President Obama was to blame for the swine flu crisis.

How dumb, how very dumb can the Republicans get? Since flu and illness isn't a partisan matter. Really, you may as well blame him that winter is cold and summer hot. Good thing this idiot isn't a Democrat or she would have blamed George W. Bush that the Katrina hurricane even happened. We can't have that kind of nonsense. Is she supposed to be a normal member of Congress or is this some crazy performance art?

Then the idiot when on to imply that swine flu epidemics have something to do with Democratic administrations, saying the last one dated back to President Carter. Well, hey, idiot, I happen to be old enough to distinctly remember getting a swine flu shot while President Ford was president.

Do I blame President Ford or the Republicans for the swine flu in the mid '70s? Of course not. That's ridiculous. Bachmann just marginalizes herself with this idiocy. What's her game anyway?

A Terrible Admission

I hurry by public bathrooms when I hear the toilet flushing. I don't want anyone stepping out and it looks like I'm standing outside listening for whatever. I'm definitely not. I don't want to hear it, see it, smell it, anything.

I'm funny that way. Plus, I'd prefer not even to be in a bathroom out in public. It's a terrible feeling to have to walk in one. It's like admitting you have body parts and it just feeds people's imagination.

Very Depressed

I've been very depressed most of the day. I mention it because I'm suddenly reminded of an old thought I had -- I think it read it somewhere -- that you should enjoy your depression.

Instead of just wanting to crawl into a hole somewhere, actually enjoy it. I wish I'd have thought of it like six hours ago. Now it's getting later in the day and I'm very sleepy. But I still have time to enjoy it.

Let me see if I can!

Loincloths In Japan

Loincloths are making a comeback -- I guess -- in Japan. As a substitute for whatever women's underwear they've been used to. That, according to a video I saw, has wires and is uncomfortable.

In the video they showed you bring it up through your legs and push it under a belt thing.

I'll see if I can find the link. At the video they say they've sold over 5,000 of them since December. Which doesn't sound like many for an entire country.

Pills With Meat

When our dog takes her pills we put them in meat. Maybe wrap them in ham, but sometimes they fall out in that case and she gets twice the meat. The best way is to stick them in the center of a piece of hotdog, and down they go.

It's such a great idea that I tried it myself. Not exactly the sticking it in a hotdog. But fixing hotdogs and just before eating them taking my pills.

Now they're down there dissolving and all mixed in with chewed up hotdogs. Nice picture.

No More GeoCities

It is with sadness that I see Yahoo is closing GeoCities, which was a very cool site in its day.

In its ongoing effort to jettison unpopular products, Yahoo said today that it will shutter GeoCities, a free personal home page service that it acquired in 1999 for $4.6 billion.

I had an early website at GeoCities. I was in the Soho/Lofts district. If you remember that, they had neighborhoods, including a little map, as I recall.

Sorry to see it go. It was fun at one time!

Old Comic Strips

There's something about old comic strips, interesting, how ephemeral they are. You read one and immediately forget it.

I ran across an old article from a newspaper today, and on the back was part of the comics page. So I flipped it over and read the two that were complete. Only one I still remember. These were from 1991. So they're out there on microfilm, probably at the newspaper archive website. But for the most part, no one cares -- and no one will ever care -- about them.

In this particular episode of "The Born Loser," the born loser is in an elevator with two other guys. One says something like, "Would you give $100 for a $20,000 watch?" And the born loser says he'd like to see it. And the guy says it's on this other guy's wrist. So he's a thief. I thought that was funny. But I've tossed it out ... so it's once again exiled to obscurity.

Tapping Out A Tune

There's an interesting thing you can do with your feet and a tune in mind. That is to tap it out with your feet, using the heels and the toe area.

Your mind definitely goes along with it, with the heel being especially a bass note and the toe treble, melody notes.

I'm doing the famous old song "Baby Elephant Walk" right now. You know how it goes. I'll do the first part, slowly: Left heel, right heel, left heel, right toe, left toe, right heel, left heel, left heel, left toe, right toe. I don't think that's right. It's easier to do by instinct than it is to try and chart it out. Plus I have very little musical talent.

No one else can tell what song you're doing. Just you.

Gum Brands

Are you chewing Neptune's trident?

The Point Of No Return

Somewhere I've written about an article I saw in Omni magazine one time about "how to have a mystical experience." Part of it had to do with depriving yourself of sleep, which probably works, if by mystical experience you just mean an altered consciousness.

I don't have any raging techniques to mention, anything surefire. But it seems like normal seeking, persistent, normal, relational prayer and devotion -- over the long term -- making it as personal and up close as possible, would be your best bet.

Putting aside mystical experiences, I wanted to say something about "The Point Of No Return," which is a title I'm putting on an experience I've had over the years, going back maybe 12-14 years, that doesn't happen very often. This experience is tricky to describe, like describing a dream. But it has always occurred when working with putting things in a series, or working with the things in a series that is going out of order in some way.

Like, say, you have 12 cards and you need to put them in order. Like alphabetical order, numerical order, in order by the personalities on them, something like that. At some point you may get these two sensations: 1) Doing it is vain or there could've been an easier way; 2) You're at the point of no return; you may as well keep going no matter how vain it is. I guess the sensation comes -- and I haven't had it for years -- quite at random. I tried to invoke it a few times intentionally but couldn't.

It really could be that whatever the spark for deja vu is might be in operation during this series work, and something about the point of no return just flips it for a second. It's brain work, after all, and brains like the harmony of a series, but sometime feel stymied by whatever.

Not A Big Reader

I have lots of books. I was commenting yesterday, somewhere, that I went to a book sale and only bought one book. A rarity for me. But just because I have lots of books doesn't mean I do a commensurate amount of reading. Because I'm busy for one. Then half the time I'm depressed and/or worried, so I can't always concentrate. And I try to get eight hours sleep everyday, so that means there's not enough time in the day.

But anyway...

A guy asked me the other day, "What are you reading?" And I'm thinking I'm going to sound dumb, but I had to say, "I'm not reading anything." Because I read five to 10 pages of about everything and hardly ever get much farther.

But today I had the book I got yesterday, and I cracked it open and looked at it. The Complete Poems of Sir Walter Scott, I think it's called. It's one of those old editions of poems, the Cambridge edition of a poet's complete works, from around 1900. I have several of these, various poets, and couldn't remember if I had this one. I started reading "The Lady of the Lake" today, and am up in the second canto. Very interesting so far!

So if anyone asks what I'm reading -- and they hardly ever do -- that's what it is, Sir Walter Scott. Gotta get that "Sir" in there, I guess.

As for my new found discipline in not buying books to excess, I picked one up at Goodwill today -- something -- and then hesitated and put it back. So that was good.

Peanuts

It bothered me for years about the Peanuts comic strip that there wasn't a character named Peanuts or that peanuts weren't mentioned in any way.

Truth in advertising, something like that was what I wanted. To me a title ought to say something about what the content is, like this particular blog post.

Paying Bills Online

I wish they would come up with a more or less standardized system for paying bills.

Every single one is a completely different website, with funky crap for signing on (some of them). One has a captcha that is supposed to be helpful, but since none of the others have it it doesn't seem entirely necessary.

One of them has a floating "comments" widget, going down the page with you. It seems to gum up the works and make my computer work slowly. Of course you have to agree that you read the terms each time, when you haven't, and since the page is so stretched out it's lost in the shuffle, this box, and it gives you an error when you don't check it.

It's better than writing out checks. And it's better than paying the post office for a stamp for every one of them. But it's still drudgery.

Heavy Metal Thunder

Ooo, I've been listening to the song "Born To Be Wild," as sung on American Idol last night by Adam Lambert. Caught it several times at You Tube and on my original tape. Pretty good, high energy, lots of action. 50 times better than the other snorers on the show!

Of course we all recall this song from a long time ago, and I believe it's been on plenty of commercials, including ones with children riding tricycles. There's someone out there who has plenty of albums for kids, like Beatles songs, Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin, for children! I used to see them when I had a Napster subscription. So there's probably a very cute version of "Born To Be Wild" that kids like, or that is in a music box in a mobile over some newborn's bed even as we speak.

Personally, I'm old enough to remember the song when it originally came out. But, believe it or not, I've never seen the movie "Easy Rider." Bits of it like on movie shows, shows about movies, but never the film. I'm not a big movie guy. I just saw the movie "Midnight Cowboy" within the last six months. That's how far behind I am.

I definitely remember hearing it on the radio, by Steppenwolf. I liked a few of their songs, the ones I was familiar with. I hated "The Pusher," and still do. Yuck.

Pizzas Don't Come With Serial Numbers

There are millions of pizzas made everyday, and it's a haphazard system. No one's keeping track. There's no oversight.

They don't come with serial numbers. By the time they'd issue the recall notice it's already eaten.

None of this applies strictly to the frozen pizza industry. If you want to call those pizzas.

Bo Obama

The Obamas got their dog and his name is Bo!

Bo, easy to spell, easy to remember.

Reminds me of the old commercial that had a song that went like this [clearing my throat]:

I got a dog, his name is Bo!
And he's got the High Pro glow.
Healthy, High Pro glow,
Energy, the High Pro glow.

I would guess it was for a dog food called "High Pro." Whether they still make it or not, I don't know. But it's really something that I could remember it, huh?

There's Nothing To See

Every time my dog sees me looking out the window like I'm looking at something, she wants to be held up to see. She's smart, because sometimes there are squirrels, which she goes wild over. But even when there's nothing in sight -- I might just be looking and lost in thought -- she still things there is.

It just happened. She lets me know by jumping against my leg. Let me up! I can say "There's nothing," but there's no way to convince her except by convincing her with her own two eyes.

"See, there aren't even any ants, unless they're ones so small you can't see them from here." They all are, of course, but she doesn't have to know.

What Is A Good Easter?

I was in the store yesterday and caught one of those snippets of conversation you hear in passing.

Two women pushing their shopping carts, and one says to the other, "Have a good Easter." And of course the response was, "You too."

It made me think as I was pushing my own cart, What is a good Easter? When do you know you've achieved a good one? If the ham is good? If the kids are happy with their treats? If church is inspiring? If it's sunny and bright?

For me, to have a good Easter will be if everything goes smoothly as it should, I live, and the day is happy. Only that's the definition of every good day, all those not-so-special days.

They Can Decipher It In The Future

In my quest to digitize my life -- to put all my class notes, term papers, and incidental projects on my computer and get rid of the paper -- I came across this word. It was in the middle of a regular size notebook page. At first I just tossed it aside, but then I thought it might be significant someday. Maybe I would wonder what it said.

I couldn't read it at first because I thought it started with a V. I was just thinking maybe science someday would come up with a way of deciphering it. But then as soon as I thought that I was able to make it out. It's an R, and it says "ratrace."

So at one time, with that paper right before me, I wrote the word "ratrace." Which according to the spell checker here must be supposed to be two words, "rat race."

It's a good word for today, just as it was back then, which would have been sometime between 1990-1992. What a treasure.

A Golf Tee

Somewhere I was walking in the last few days I saw a white golf tee on the ground. I didn't pick it up.

I know there was a time in my life when I definitely would've picked it up. I don't know why I didn't. I should've picked it up just to be picking it up, so someone wouldn't come along and step on it. Or because it's litter. Or because maybe I could do something with it.

My memory is so bad at this moment that I can't even remember where it was. But there it was and I considered picking it up but not seriously enough to give it a second thought. Till now.

I'm usually pretty good about picking things up. But not pennies either. I didn't pick one of those up the other day.

I don't play golf so I don't really need a golf tee. But they might be fun to have around.

My Dog's Legs

My dog got her leg fur trimmed today. Not quite shaved because there's still fur there, but they're about half the size they were. It's weird looking, like a sheep.

Anyway, I'm thinking, she can barely support her weight now with those skinny legs. She needs the extra fur to hold herself up. There's hardly room in there anymore for her bones.

Wouldn't a true dog bury the bones in her legs so she'd have them for later?

Obama's Poll Numbers

Somewhere today I saw that President Obama's poll numbers remain high and the Republicans' remain low. I'm glad.

Let the Republicans continue to shoot themselves in the foot, whatever. They're aligning themselves with all kinds of radicals, like the Fox News crew, etc. I saw a video of David Schuster, MSNBC, where he was talking with a guy from the NY Times and a guy from some gun lobbying organization.

The gun guy was talking for the wacko side of life, that Obama is trying to take away everyone's guns, etc. Which aligns them exactly with this cop killer from a few days ago who supposedly did it because he believed the idiocy that Obama is trying to take away everyone's guns. But everyone, you see, needs their guns because ... I don't know ... they might need to make a vain last stand against the repressive government. Good luck with that. As long as you don't have tanks and bombers, who do you think will win?

Plus, anyway, it's not even going to happen. There's such a thing as paranoia going too far, and that's all this is. Oh, and the Republicans trying to score points with radical fringe groups because ... they think that's the road back to political dominance? Someone throw them an anvil in case they drop this one!

I actually own guns and believe in the right to own guns. But I'm not stupid enough to think my guns are enough to take on an oppressive government. Which we don't have. Duh. It's all such vain nonsense.

The Smells Of Life

Someone I know today said he thought there was "a hot smell" in the men's bathroom of a place.

This is going to be unpleasant, I would expect, because it means I need to go into the men's bathroom and start sniffing. There's hardly anything in the men's bathroom that could be on fire, but if there is, I'm fully prepared to put it out anyway I can. Fully prepared.

So I went in, and I'm sniffing. I've recently had some nose problems, smelling things that other people can't smell, etc., so I'm already dubious going in that I'm going to be able to identify it. But I can smell something right away, but it doesn't smell hot or burning.

It smelled like one of those cakes of deodorizer that they put in a urinal. But it seemed like it must be emanating from a room deodorizer that was up on a shelf. Why we've never noticed it before, I don't know. He reached and got it and held it to my nose. It definitely didn't smell great, but I think it was doing the job it was meant to do.

The smell could've been something out of the urinal as well. Who knows how well it gets flushed? Or even if every person who goes in there bothers to flush it.

Taking A Nap

I layed down at around 1 and got up about 3. It seemed like a longer time than that. But the daylight outside let me know it wasn't 3 in the morning.

My trusty dog was right at my side. She was downstairs when I layed down. (By the way, I don't know my 'lays,' laid, layed, laying, lain, whatever. So I'll just type it the way it seems best. My little spell thing keeps telling me 'layed' is wrong. So be it!) Anyway, I layed down and gave a high pitched call to the dog, her name. She came bounding up and was in my bed. And by golly she was still there when I woke up.

That's faithfulness. Dogs have to be the laziest animals. Like cats but faithful. Whether I should have taken the nap is up for debate. It's refreshing but also a waste of time. But once it's done you need to move on from there.

I really could use some candy right about now. But there isn't any.

Obama Fried Chicken

There's some controversy about a place called Obama Fried Chicken. I think the controversy has to do with the name, which, coincidentally, is also the name of our current president.

But President Obama doesn't own or have a copyright on the name Obama, does he? It seems like there'd have to be other people with the same name, meaning it could be used like any other word. I mean, we have Bush's Baked Beans. Which even though I couldn't stand George Bush I still ate.

The article said the O and A had been filled in, leaving it Bam Fried Chicken. But I say let it remain Obama Fried Chicken. There was a lot of cashing in on Obama after the election and especially around the Inauguration. If this place wants their restaurant to be called that, it seems like it'd be their business.

Michelle's Fashions

It must be terrible to be the First Lady for various reasons.

One of the biggest has to be the whole fashion issue. She must have an enormous budget for fashion, and it must not be big enough for some people.

There was an article today that Oscar de la Renta was criticizing something about Michelle's fashions that she wore in Europe. Please. Go back to Renta Center, where you came from.

She should be allowed to do more in life than change clothes and parade around for the critics. Go pick on Palin.

Obama Abroad

I'm not paying close attention to the news. But I see Obama is abroad, in Europe somewhere. Well, he met with the Queen, of course. As for anywhere else he may be, I don't know.

I don't really like watching the news that much. I don't like a lot of gratuitous criticism of him. And that's what we get every time they parade in all these Republican traitors. The guys and gals from the R side are such crooks, liars, and phonies that you can't believe anything out of their mouth. They're such hypocrites too, which, however true it is seems to be an insult that doesn't stick. They have the advantage of people's short memories. Also they have the advantage of politics normally stinking, so they stay somewhat below the radar because of that. But I'm remembering. They put us through the paces with that crook George Bush, but now they can't cut Obama any slack no matter what he does.

I saw a few of the pictures of Obama with the other world leaders. They must be glad to have him instead of that crook Bush. The German leader was threatening to walk out -- as I understand it. Maybe Obama wasn't fast enough with the neck rub. The other leaders. Whatever they're up to? Who knows? Sarkozy hasn't been the same since his phone conversation with Palin. So he's probably still mad being punked like that. (Real Sarkozy, fake Palin; I think it was the other way 'round.)

Speaking of Palin, how is it this dim bulb is still emitting a flicker of light in the public eye? And speaking of dim bulbs still emitting a flicker of light, Joe the Plumber is still out there. It seems he's ticked off real plumbers by parroting the conservative line of crap. Then when confronted about it he didn't even know what he was talking about. So maybe all is forgiven. It's weird relating to him, isn't it? He was an illustration during a debate. That's it. McCain exploited him for those moments. Now he's made a career out of it.

Bobby Jindal is praying no more volcanoes blow up. That's the news as I can remember.

One Take Away One

I saw some kids working out some arithmetic problems on the chalkboard the other day. They were formulating them and then putting the answers. I can remember a couple of them. One was 9 x 1 = 9. Another was 2 x 2 = 4. And they had some bigger numbers too, including perhaps some hundreds. It's great practice for when they're at school and they whip out these problems on you.

I've been digitizing some of my old papers -- class notes, term papers, priceless stuff like that. I brought some files of this stuff up from the basement, and I've done around 1,500 pages. My desire to do it comes and goes. But when it's here, I try to get something done, because I know it will disappear again. It's the spring cleaning bug.

So I look at the files -- ugh -- and photograph each page and think I'm taking away one page each one that's done. 40 minus 1, etc., all the way down to none. If I ever live to see "none," who knows? The bug can't last that long.